Dateable Diary #1

Ugh why doesn't the blogger app hav a landscape mode!?! Other than that it's perfect, but that's a big thing to not have.

Anyway. Dateable happend as part of "films with friends" a rededication of my video making efforts. It stars people who are not me which is a very d'être ing change,

I'm doing first edit now, just over 2 hours of forage from 2 cameras. I will speak about the sections I "finish" and leave out script details so we can all be surprised in how disappointed we are.

I had about 1.5 ideas for the visual look of this and one of them is upfront. I don't actually get ideas myself, just find new things to rip off. And in this opening we are ripping off a "how to use a monopod" segment from vimeo.com. It was rough looking while shooting but I like how the idea turned out.

This was the first thing we shot with Our actress and i think that worked out because the quick takes and running around of her comfortable. It also gave her a moment to take in where the video is being shot and get a visual on her costar without being thrown into his arms immediately.

I spiced in a couple shots of our actor but I think I'm going to cut them out. Right now this segment is just under a minute and I am going to need much time as possible later for jokes to cover up the fact the whole video takes place in one room. Also having out actor talked about but not seen or heard kind of ups the ante on what kind of stud/douche he's gonna be.

This segment leads directly into the conversation that will take up the rest of the movie. The first line from out actor feels like it takes forever to spit out, it makes me dread editing the rest of it because my goal to keep this thing moving and all I have is singles and the occasional movement worth showing to an audience. Oh well we will find it.

As of right now my goal for this video is to be 7-8 minutes, I would be ecstatic if I could fit everything good and tell a complete story in 5 or less, but I don't think it's going happen.

I'm done, thanks to my director of photography totally not seeing my head in the reflection of an otherwise excellent shot. I would have made the same mistake, I'm sure it'll get a laugh, and that's one more than the dialogue will get.

Saw 7/3D/FinalChapter/see you for the reboot!

Yay Netflix updated! I feel like Netflix has been getting slowed down by the jealous studios.

But until they come to an agreement I have the Saw finale (maybe for 3 years at most) and you have this live blog.

We have our hero(?) from the very first movie, I first liked then hated the retconning of additional plot in previous movies. Our Dr hero is noticably ten years older despite this taking place during the first movie.

The digital video they film these with is disgusting, even without the film content.

Dream sequences and nonstop traps in first 15 minutes, smart move. Also the movie is very bright, probably due to the 3D glasses they expected people to wear.

Sean Patrick Flannery (SPF)! Why didn't this guy get famous in the 90's. The most 90's dude I ever saw. He's faking being a jigsaw survivor, I doubt he'll be faking it for long. Looking bloated but he's probably past 40 so looking k.

So they are just making up jigsaw victims and flashing back to stuff from nonexistent flashbacks.

I doubt these movies pay well, and I'm sure you have to scrub pretty hard to get it off a resume. So many Canadian haircuts and accents!

SPF is nabbed! Just when I thought I was safe! There's a new cop in this one, hopefully he can catch the personality-less jigsaw helper by the time this franchise is over. The jigsaw helper escaped his trap nicely at the opening of the movie, much like the dude from Gilmore girls did 3 movies ago.

Live or die SPF, make your choice. Maybe he did this movie to motivate the studio to do another boondocks saints. Oh good, another flashback! Now showing us why/how SPF faked the jigsaw trap. He's got a bowl cut so I'll assume the flashback is from 1997 grunge or 2009 beiber fever struck the nation.

New cop has Canadian new York accent. "I knew you were crazy when I first laid eyes on you. Crazy." Sounds like the cop from heavy rain.

They should just start filming the saw reboot now in the entire east side of Michigan. I think the mood and broken down factories are already in place for it. How much money/time does jigsaw/new jigsaw have for these traps?

Why is jigsaw punishing his real former victim wife? Is it due to her being complicit in his lie? Is it because new jigsaw has no moral code? Oh speak of devil here is flashback of real jigsaw. That's what we call a meet cute!

Darn it movie no one cares about the bad cop procedural!

Jigsaw needs to provide operator instruction sheets and get signatures before starting a game. If consistent work isn't being followed then how can you expect a consistent product?

I have now caged my dog in front of the tv to calm him down for bed. I am the jigsaw to his soon to be dead students.

Flashback to cop vs new jigsaw grudge? Oh... Not yet, just some detective work. I converted a m4v to wmv at work today without installing any new software, now that's detective work.

The next jigsaw game is what I'm playing with youth group next week. Hopefully with fewer casualties.

I can't tell if my alarm is going off upstairs or the soundtrack has added a new terrible layer.

I love stuff only shot for 3D in 2D, like Thors hammer coming at the screen, or in this cases key falling out of a potential survivors hand.

Here's that cop/jigsaw flashback!

Movie 67% over with. I've went to Facebook, I fear a friend with a new profile pic is pregnant, I'm pretty good at telling women when they are pregnant. I think I even knew when my mon got pregnant before she did. I think I get this trait from my father because he took off running as soon as he got a whiff of me.

SPF is ripping out his teeth to get a locker combination, if I was jigsaw old just have the locker short locked.

The cop left the scene of the game to probably get himself killed or trapped alone somewhere. SPF got electric fenced and the dog and I jumped. I love how the wife is too mad at SPF to follow her natural survival instincts.

I love fake Hollywood abs. Also dumb cop looks like my boss. Also jigsaw did a variation of the twist theyve done since first saw. Also jigsaw killed cop with auto turret, with an amazing death fall from cop realizing he'll never act in this town again.

New jigsaw just killed every cop in town. SPF is going through with the trap he faked while his wife screams "you can do it!". Now that I see trap he could easily have done it without the injury. When jigsaw comes for me I think I'll be k.

Oh fake run from jigsaw! You can do it old jigsaws fake wife! I'm rooting for you... Wait am I rooting for her? New jigsaw walks, kills and talks like fat terminator.

SPF wife caught in some stove after he fails. New jigsaw takes forever fighting wife after killing every cop in hand to hand combat. But she's gone with the cheesey routine catchphrase "game over."

But new jigsaw is taken out by Carey Elwes from Saw 1 who was his secret accomplice despite not being in Saw 2-6. GAME OVER #2. IM OUT!

I am writing this from the toilet

There is finally a first party blogger app for the iPhone. Hopefully this will inspire me to write more often and more concisely. I'm debating giving up my iPhone plan next month. My contract is up and now I have a work phone... TBD. Idk what I will do without a constant Internet connection and that kind of excites me. I would probably keep this on me as wifi is in 90% of my stomping grounds.

With this relaunch of the blog, expect a lot less jokes... I just don't got it in me lately.

Sleep!

I need it, I will never have enough of it. I have been especially loud and disruptive at sleep lately. This may be due to half my body wanting to get up and play, and the other half would like the icy grip of death to rock me gently to eternal slumber. I have a dog now and he's a pretty good sleeping buddy when he's in the mood. Although when what's her face gets home he loses his mind and ruins everything.

I could go on but it's 11:21 and sadly I must work tomorrow. I have a 1 hour commute, I can't even sleep during it!

Women, you are not allowed go on a date

Until You Read This.

"I am special. I am also pretty and smart and all that other crap. I am no one's second choice. I want someone to share adventures with and I want to grow with someone. If this doesn't work out I will be fine but I really hope this goes somewhere. I have proper places for the current people and situations in my life and there is room for a relationship. I am willing to work for someone, but I will not tolerate being treated unfairly."

If you can't read that and have it be 99% true then you are not allowed to go on a date. I forbid it. If you can not imagine the person you are going on a date with saying this then you are not allowed to date that person. I am your father and you will do as I say.

BUT WAIT THERE IS MORE

"I would like to go on a date with you because I would like to go on a date with you. I am not bringing you into my life so that I can have stories to share. If I feel like talking about our experiences I will, stories will be told with respect for you and for me. I have told the gossips in my life to get their own life. I am not doing this to bring anyone else pleasure or pain. You are not an obligation. I am excited to see you and see where this goes."

Again if you can't say this about yourself or assume it about your prospective suitor then you should probably make it a solitaire night.

Oh and one more deal maker statement for you and your man "I do not have a blog"

Good luck out there ladies.